Top 5 Strangest Plastic Surgery Procedures

Plastic SurgerySome of the most painfully pointless plastic surgeries ever

I guess some people never heard of the saying “be happy with what God gave you” because there is some seriously wacky shit out there which would make the rest of us wince even looking at it. In the quest for beauty and perfection, some people will literally disfigure themselves, sometimes beyond recognition. We have all seen the disaster photographs, Jocelyn Wildenstein, what the fuck is that? There are a lot worse than her around too.

Here are 5 of the most ridiculous plastic surgeries:

1. Stiletto Surgeries: Ow, ow and double ow. I love shoes as musch as the next girl, sometimes I even take my slippers off long enough to put them on but this is ridiculous. It involves getting your pinky toe removed so you can fit in to narrower high heels. Yuck. Did anyone ever tell these people the pinky toe is for balance, cutting it off to put on stilettos is just a disaster waiting to happen. Oh I forgot these kind of people don’t understand reason.

2. Cankle Lipo: Yop, you got fat ankles? Just cut em off! It is not even a good idea. How are you supposed to recover from that. In fact they will just balloon to double the size after the surgery. You would want a good comfy chair and a foot rest until you are able to walk again.

3. Increasing Height: No need for high heels or vertical stripes to make you appear taller, now you can actually get taller, with surgery. Instantly the taffy puller in Willy Wonka’s factory comes to mind to stretch out Mike TV after he shrunk however this is something different altogether. Rather than coming to terms with your height and becoming self assured and confident, na, just change it through surgery, bone grafts, skin grafts, all kinds of painful stuff.  Maybe Harry Potter will lend you some Skele Grow.

4. Foot Padding: Can’t be bothered with getting the gel pad insoles? Just want comfy feet permanently? Well then go for the “Dermal Filler” surgery to make sure you can wear those perfect heels. Just remember it is a highly experimental surgery which will could mean you end up on crutches. Just sayin’.

5. Eye Colour Change: Now I have heard it all. This is is beyond ridiculous. If you want to change your eye colour, get novelty lenses. You can have all the colours of the rainbow. Eyes are so sensitive they are the last things which should be messed around with. Do you hate your green eyes that much that you have to turn them blue?

Excuse me until I throw up into my breakfast. Have you any plastic surgery horror stories you would like to share? Please do. And remember beauty is in the eye of the beholder, not in the hands of some doctor.

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